50 shades of steve.
an unexpected introduction.
earlier in the week, i was asked to write an “about the artist” biography for a local community art exhibit application. it had to be 250 words or less. i’m never quite sure what to write in those. what are the things that people really need to know about me that will influence how they see me and my work? and then i started thinking about all of the “other stuff”- the things that are unique, interesting, and i’ll likely never share in a public setting.
this post was inspired by
you might know me. but, do you know the real me?
probably not- i’m still figuring him out as well.
and so, best of luck to both of us.
these fragments, facts, and seemingly useless pieces of information about me are in a completely random order. that doesn’t make any of them less important.
most of these facts are things that i would commonly share in casual conversation. i think of these more like the “about me” that no one asked for, i normally wouldn’t share, but had a lot of fun putting together anyway!
1. “2+2=5” by Radiohead is the greatest song ever written.
2. i bite my nails. a lot. i tried the nasty tasting clear nail polish. didn’t work.
3. i try not to tell people that i eat plant-based unless it comes up organically in conversation. obnoxious, braggy vegans drive me batty.
4. the two things i struggle to draw are dogs and cars.
5. at this point (there’s no way to tell for certain) i’ve watched the series, The Office (US) all of the way through- well over 30 times. and i have no intent to slow down.
6. The Office (US) came out when i was in high school and i thought it was the most stupid, ridiculous show that i had ever seen. and now it’s my favorite. people can change.
7. echinacea is my favorite flower.
8. i’ve been to disneyland 4 times.
9. i don’t like selfies. or photos in general.
10. ever since i got my first PC when i was 16, i had this dream of a computer being able to transfer smell. specifically, i want to be able to sample cologne fragrances through my computer. this sounds crazy, but i actually think this technology could exist in my lifetime.
11. i’ve never seen Forrest Gump (and i have no intention to).
12. i don’t really like trying new food in a restaurant. i like consistency. unfamiliar restaurant selections seldom bring me joy.
13. i have epilepsy. somedays, i wish it away. but, overall, it’s been one of the best things in my life and it’s taken me a looooong time to own that.
14. i feel like i should have been a Gen X-er, not a Millennial. i don’t fit in with my generation.
15. i don’t think that my art is as controversial as i would like it to be.
16. my high school lunch was the same everyday: a can of coke and a bag of doritos.
17. i flip my pillow consistently during the night while i sleep so i can always lay on the cool side.
18. Saxx underwear is absolutely worth the higher price tag.
19. i have this innate desire to travel, but i don’t really like travelling.
20. lately, i’ve been watching Bridgerton, and i kind of hate myself for that.
21. i switched to pepsi briefly when the spice girls started endorsing it in 1997. they made pepsi seem edgy and badass.
22. the rapture isn’t something that i believe in.
23. i like to illustrate all of my rough drafts in blue before i do a black outline. it reminds me of creating a blueprint.
24. i own more lego than you. it’s a humble brag and probably a fact.
25. i don’t have wisdom teeth. literally. they don’t exist. every time i get x-rays at the dentist office, they call all of the hygienists in the room to look at my mouth like i’m a medical marvel. it’s kind of awkward.
26. i couldn’t snap my fingers until my early twenties.
27. when i watched “Through the Eyes of Tammy Faye” for the first time, it recalled serious religious trauma in my life, made me feel like i had been kicked in the gut, and i sat in bed for an hour after without moving or saying anything. you should go watch that movie.
28. the only “video game” that i play is pokemon go. i’ve been playing for 8 years. i'm pretty sure that i’m the only reason why the game is still around.
29. i never learned how to tie my shoes in the traditional way. i do the bunny ear method. (my super-religious dad had a song he would sing when he tried to teach me how to tie shoes: “around the bend, and under the tree, that’s where Betty Lou made love to me.” he had absolutely no clue what that meant.)
30. Tammy Faye’s son reached out to me last year and asked me to do an illustration of his mother. it’s currently in his daughters’ bedroom. this is really special because they’ve never met their grandmother.
31. one of my best friends lives 1300 miles from me. we met on instagram through his writing and my art. and we’ve never met face-to-face (yet).
32. i don’t watch reels. or things on youtube.
33. cilantro is gross. it doesn’t taste like dirt- it’s more of a sensation that my mouth doesn’t like.
34. i used to play the lottery every few weeks. just one ticket. i usually won a dollar or a free ticket. but, my big break is still coming… right?
35. when i go shopping at ikea, it irks me when people shop by walking against the flow of traffic and don’t follow the arrows.
36. the Okanagan in BC, Canada is one of the greatest places to live. it’s the most beautiful place i’ve ever been to: mountains behind my house and the view of lakes from my living room window.
37. i’ve written two books. one is called Thin Spaces and is available on amazon for your reading pleasure. the other is called be(coming) and only a single copy exists- which means you’ll have to come over to my house to read it. see you soon!
38. i have several tattoos. one is a large blue heart on the center of my forearm. one time, i was in the emergency room because i had a series of seizures, the doctor on call told me that from his angle, my tattoo looked like blue balls. he wasn’t my favorite person for saying that.
39. i never dreamt that i would have the opportunity to design book covers. over the past few years, i’ve done 5 and counting. if you’re looking for an illustrator, i’m your guy.
40. live action disney movies are generally disappointing. when i was 5, the animated version of beauty and the beast inspired me to become an animator for disney. but, the live action is cringe. c’mon disney- i know that you can make better choices!
41. in the past year, i’ve been invited to come guest on 8 different podcasts. i’m still in shock that people want to hear my story and the things that i have to say. there are so many awesome people out there and i love platforms where we can spread kindness.
42. i like eating dinner late in the evening. usually around 8pm.
43. when i was a youth pastor, i was running an all-nighter event, and the movie i chose for the kids to watch was “Liar, Liar” without prescreening it. that movie is pretty dirty. one of the leaders came up to me while it was playing and told me that i was the coolest youth pastor that he had ever met.
44. on sundays, i vacuum my house and listen to the Mel Robbins podcast. she’s like my drill sergeant. sometimes, i feel like she’s yelling at me like the personal trainers did on The Biggest Loser. overall, i think she’s actually inspiring me to live a better life.
45. my daughter is one of the coolest people that i’ve ever met. she has hazel eyes- just like me. i love that connection. we also have matching Demon Slayer bracelets. things like that are what i hope she remembers when she becomes an adult.
46. my son is a musical prodigy and he has no clue how gifted he is. he’s very humble. he has also taught me to be more kind to strangers because he has done that so effortlessly his entire life.
47. shopping at costco gives me huge anxiety. i reward myself with a twist ice cream cone sometimes because i made it through without a panic attack.
48. i have a fragrance obsession. wearing cologne daily and burning scented candles are two of the most powerful methods of self care that i practice.
49. i’m afraid of dogs because one attacked me when i was a toddler. it’s kind of ironic because we have a dog currently. but, people often make fun of my fear. i notice that these people tend to be terrified of spiders… guys, one is significantly bigger than the other and has large teeth… but you do you!
50. a white mocha americano at starbucks is the best drink ever.
if you have a random fact (or two, or three) that would help me get to know you better, i’d love to read them in the comments section, or send me a message!
Before you go, don’t forget to subscribe to my other publication- re:COVER.
There are a lot of fun things going on over there and I don’t want you to miss out!
I enjoyed this a lot. There’s quite a few things on here I agree with you on
I absolutely hate Costco (it's literally a zoo of angry deal hunters) and taking photos (it feels as if the camera is capturing your soul).